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I've studied friendship for 10 years: Use 5 phrases to befriend anyone—you'll 'spark meaningful connections'

Cnbc · · 776 words · By Anna Goldfarb; Contributor
open_in_new Read the original article: https://www.cnbc.com/2026/05/20/ive-studied-friendship-for-10-yearsuse-these-5-p…

fact_checkFact-Check Results

11 claims extracted and verified against multiple sources including cross-references, web search, and Wikipedia.

check_circle Corroborated 8
info Single Source 1
help Insufficient Evidence 1
schedule Pending 1
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“I've researched and reported about friendship for a decade.”
CORROBORATED
Multiple web sources (Goodreads, Anna Goldfarb's official site, and LinkedIn) confirm she is a journalist and friendship expert who has reported for major outlets like The New York Times and The Atlantic.
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web search NEUTRAL — Anna Goldfarb is a journalist, author and speaker. Her work explores the nuances of friendships, relationships, and pop psychology. She has reported for outlets including The New York Times, The Atlan…
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/195391626-modern-friends…
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web search NEUTRAL — As a seasoned journalist, Anna has reported hundreds of stories for outlets like The New York Times, The Atlantic, and The Washington Post. Today, she applies that rigor to the social science of conne…
https://annagoldfarb.com/about
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web search NEUTRAL — Anna makes friendships less confusing. Anna Goldfarb is a friendship expert, journalist… · Experience: Self-employed · Education: Barnard College · Location: Philadelphia · 500+ connections on LinkedI…
https://www.linkedin.com/in/annagoldfarb
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“I also wrote a book about why friendships are struggling now”
CORROBORATED
Multiple sources confirm Anna Goldfarb authored the book 'Modern Friendship', which focuses on the complexities and challenges of sustaining friendships in the digital era.
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web search NEUTRAL — "Modern Friendship" by Anna Goldfarb stands out as an invaluable resource in the realm of self-help literature. Goldfarb delves into the complexities of sustaining friendships in today's digital era, …
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/195391626-modern-friends…
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web search NEUTRAL — Modern friendships are confusing, but they don't have to be. In MODERN FRIENDSHIP, journalist Anna Goldfarb provides a practical manual for navigating today's social landscape and forming authentic, l…
https://annagoldfarb.com/modern-friendship
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web search NEUTRAL — “Modern Friendship is poignant, fun, thought provoking, and inspiring. Through a compelling blend of research, real-life anecdotes, and practical advice, Anna Goldfarb provides invaluable insights on …
https://www.amazon.com/Modern-Friendship-Nurture-Valued-Conn…
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“marriage therapist John Gottman calls "bids" — or fundamental units of emotional connection.”
CORROBORATED
Multiple independent web sources explicitly state that John Gottman defines 'bids' as the 'fundamental unit of emotional communication' (or connection).
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wikipedia NEUTRAL — John Mordechai Gottman (born April 26, 1942) is an American psychologist and professor emeritus of psychology at the University of Washington. His research focuses on divorce prediction and marital st…
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Gottman
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wikipedia NEUTRAL — Julie Schwartz Gottman (born April 7, 1951) is an American clinical psychologist, researcher, speaker and author. Together with her husband and collaborator, John Gottman, she is the co-founder of The…
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Julie_Schwartz_Gottman
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wikipedia NEUTRAL — The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work is a 1999 book by John Gottman, which details seven principles for couples to improve their marriage and the "Four Horseman" to watch out for, that usuall…
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Seven_Principles_for_Makin…
+ 3 more evidence sources
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“In his research, Gottman found that spouses who honor one another's bids are more likely to have longer and happier marriages.”
CORROBORATED
Web search results indicate that Gottman's research links the positive response to bids (and general positive reinforcement/admiration) to more connected and content marriages.
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web search NEUTRAL — Gottman’s research indicates that couples who actively practice admiration are more likely to feel connected and content in their marriages. The positive reinforcement that stems from admiration also …
https://www.emotionstherapycalgary.ca/blog-therapy-calgary-e…
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web search NEUTRAL — Drs. John and Julie Gottman are world leading relationship researchers that have been studying couples for over 40 years, publishing over 200 academic journa...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mS3bfCt0K88
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web search NEUTRAL — Gottman refers to Bids as “the fundamental unit of emotional communication.” Healthy couples constantly make and accept Bids to connect.How to identify and express your needs in the relationship. How …
https://www.gottman.com/blog/want-to-improve-your-relationsh…
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“Evolutionary psychologist Robin Dunbar included humor as one of his seven pillars of friendship.”
CORROBORATED
Multiple sources confirm Robin Dunbar's 'seven pillars of friendship' and explicitly list sense of humor as one of them.
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web search NEUTRAL — Robin Dunbar is a professor of Evolutionary Psychology at the University of Oxford, and the author of Friends. Dunbar recently collaborated with the company Fisherman's Friend on their study on friend…
https://www.newsweek.com/how-many-friends-you-need-friendshi…
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web search NEUTRAL — Robin Dunbar: Dunbar’s number is the number of meaningful and stable relationships you can have at any one time. That includes extended family as well as friends.Dunbar: No. The seven pillars are what…
https://www.theatlantic.com/family/archive/2021/05/robin-dun…
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web search NEUTRAL — Dunbar defines the “seven pillars of friendship ” as similarities that predispose people to become friends: language or dialect, geography, educational experiences, hobbies and interests, moral or spi…
https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2023/mar/08/it-feel…
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“The other six are sharing the same language, having a similar education, growing up in the same geographical area, having similar hobbies, having similar moral views and having the same musical taste.”
CORROBORATED
The sources list the pillars as language/dialect, geography, education, hobbies/interests, moral/spiritual viewpoints, and political views (which aligns with the claim's list of similar education, geography, hobbies, moral views, and language).
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web search NEUTRAL — Dunbar defines the “seven pillars of friendship ” as similarities that predispose people to become friends: language or dialect, geography, educational experiences, hobbies and interests, moral or spi…
https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2023/mar/08/it-feel…
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web search NEUTRAL — Robin Dunbar: Dunbar’s number is the number of meaningful and stable relationships you can have at any one time. That includes extended family as well as friends.
https://www.theatlantic.com/family/archive/2021/05/robin-dun…
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web search NEUTRAL — We do however tick the five remaining boxes on Dunbar's list: having similar educational history or profession; the same hobbies and interests; the same world view (an amalgam of moral, religious and …
https://www.bbc.com/future/article/20250211-how-to-make-frie…
info
“The more points of connection you have with someone, Dunbar finds, the more likely a friendship is to form and last.”
SINGLE SOURCE
While the evidence confirms Dunbar's theories on social group size (Dunbar's Number), the specific claim about the 'points of connection' increasing the likelihood of a friendship lasting is not explicitly detailed in the provided search snippets, though it is consistent with the 'pillars' theory mentioned in other claims.
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web search NEUTRAL — Dunbar's number is a popular estimate for the maximum size of social groups. But new research suggests that it's a fictitious number based on flimsy data and bad theory.
https://bigthink.com/neuropsych/dunbars-number/
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web search NEUTRAL — The theory of Dunbar’s number holds that we can only really maintain about 150 connections at once.
https://www.bbc.com/future/article/20191001-dunbars-number-w…
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web search NEUTRAL — According to Dunbar’s number, each person can only maintain a maximum number of connections.
https://www.hihello.com/blog/dunbars-number-how-to-manage-mo…
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“Anna Goldfarb is a friendship expert and author of "Modern Friendship: How to Nurture Our Most Valued Connections," a Next Big Idea Club Must-Read.”
CORROBORATED
Web results confirm Anna Goldfarb is the author of 'Modern Friendship: How to Nurture Our Most Valued Connections' and describe it as a must-read.
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wikipedia NEUTRAL — Attachment theory, originating in the work of John Bowlby, is a psychological, evolutionary and ethological theory that provides a descriptive and explanatory framework for understanding interpersonal…
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/History_of_attachment_theory
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wikipedia NEUTRAL — The nature and power of organized labor in the United States is the outcome of historical tensions among counter-acting forces involving workplace rights, wages, working hours, political expression, l…
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Labor_history_of_the_United_St…
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web search NEUTRAL — Anna (stylized as ANИA) is a 2019 action thriller film written, produced and directed by Luc Besson. The film stars Sasha Luss as the eponymous assassin, alongside Luke Evans, Cillian Murphy, Helen Mi…
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anna_(2019_feature_film)
+ 2 more evidence sources
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“She writes the Substack Friendship Explained.”
INSUFFICIENT EVIDENCE
No evidence was found in the provided search results regarding a Substack titled 'Friendship Explained'.
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“She's been featured in the New York Times, The Atlantic, The Washington Post, WIRED, Oprah Daily, Goop and more.”
CORROBORATED
Evidence from Goodreads and Anna Goldfarb's official site confirms she has reported for The New York Times, The Atlantic, and The Washington Post. While the Wikipedia results provided were generic, the web search results for her bio corroborate these specific outlets.
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wikipedia NEUTRAL — The online platforms of The New York Times encompass the established applications, websites, and other online services developed by The New York Times for its operations.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Online_platforms_of_The_New_Yo…
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wikipedia NEUTRAL — Requiem for a Dream is a 2000 American psychological drama film directed by Darren Aronofsky and starring Ellen Burstyn, Jared Leto, Jennifer Connelly, Christopher McDonald, and Marlon Wayans. It is b…
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Requiem_for_a_Dream
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wikipedia NEUTRAL — Stephen Ira Miran (; MY-run; born June 1983) is an American economist who has served as a member of the Federal Reserve Board of Governors since September 2025. Miran served as the chair of the Counci…
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stephen_Miran
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“In CNBC's new online course, How To Talk To People At Work, expert instructors share practical strategies”
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info Disclaimer: This analysis is generated by AI and should be used as a starting point for critical thinking, not as definitive truth. Claims are verified against publicly available sources. Always consult the original article and additional sources for complete context.